How to enrich your life

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What do you need to know first is that no one is gonna come into your life and change it.

It basically doesn’t happen. Maybe you heard stories about someone saying “that person changed my life”. It didn’t start like that, it starts with a person who’s changing the mindset and the attitude and being more open to make someone come into his life and give him love. I know it’s so cliche but you are the writer of your own life. No one is gonna write for you. So just imagine the life you want and start to write it, start to put all the pieces together.

And I know people say all the time like so naive to think that like life consists of unicorns, rainbows and flowers,  but just go and make that happen, make your life like a fairytale, like u wanna  be and fill it with happiness, kisses and etc.

And I really-really believe it’s just a lot of shit when people say that our life is a random accident and that you have no control over it. Because I can go out right now with my friend, set up like a picnic with fruits, laugh, we can smile to the strangers. I can create a memory that I will never forget or can continue sitting in the room with my laptop scrolling down Facebook and I will never remember that moment.

That is totally up to me, it’s mine choice, no one else’s.

It’s all about getting that attitude to know that you’re the writer of your own life, you’re in charge of your life.

And yes, you are a victim. Everybody is a victim of a different things, no one has a perfect life, everybody has been through something that is not cool, but don’t treat yourself like a victim and don’t let other people treat you like one. Everything that you have been through is not like something positive, but  it doesn’t define who you are or your life. So, stop complaining about it. Just do your best to have a good time.

We only have one life, why not to make the most of it. Don’t let someone else’s mistake drag you down and move your life. Use that then as a motivation to work harder and succeed, and be happy. You’ve got a million and one thing to be grateful. Write those things down, think about it everyday, focus on that and just forget about all the horrible things that you have been through.

It’s not about sitting and waiting for something to happen. It’s time to take action. Nothing new is gonna  happen in your life if you continue doing the same things every single day. The same job, the same people, the same cloth, the same talks – nothing new is gonna happen.

If you want something new, you have to do something differently. We have to go out of our comfort zone and that doesn’t mean that you have to always be like uncomfortable, it means that eventually your comfort zone is gonna expand, you will grow and become more comfortable with yourself, and love yourself more.

It’s worse to regret something you didn’t do than something you did. Let’s be a ‘YES’ people. It’s not about stupid and dangerous things. It’s about the small moments and just small things – smiles, sunsets, sunrises, fresh air, traveling, flowers, music, you can continue that list. What does enrich your life?

For me, personally, and I think it’s like for a lot of people – the best way to enrich your life is to enrich someone else’s life. Give and share. I hope it makes sense.

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How do we self-sabotage?

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I’m friends with a large number of incredibly brilliant people. But I’ve noticed something through the years: even the most incredible minds among us get stuck in thought loops and habit patterns that lead to self-sabotage.

Why is this?

Because we’ve grown accustomed to thinking as opposed to feeling our way through life. Because from the time we’re young, we build our sense of self (and security) based on the rightness of our thoughts as opposed to the wholeness of our beings. Because we know everything about how it should be. Because we are living among “perfect people”.

Ways Smart People Self Sabotage

We believe we’re supposed to have the right answers, right now.

Our minds are impatient. We’re wired to reason our way to relief. Once we learn to listen deeply, however, and engage our whole awareness, we realize that we have all the answers we need and can effectively utilize in this moment. As we align our minds with our hearts, we become increasingly comfortable NOT knowing the answers and come to trust in life as an inherently supportive process.

We underestimate the value of our uniqueness.

When we look around and no one else is like us, we begin to think we’re better off conforming than risking ridicule by showing up in all our quirky uniqueness. It is precisely this uniqueness, however, that attracts the kind of people we WANT in our lives and places us on the path that feels right for us.

We fall prey to perfectionism.

We’ve been taught that being smart means presenting as perfectly as possible. This keeps many of us from putting much of ANYTHING out there (much less our truest selves) for fear of being found out for all our “flaws.”

 “Perfectionism is not a quest for the best. It is a pursuit of the worst in ourselves, the part that tells us that nothing we do will ever be good enough.”

We think ourselves out of taking chances.

Because we are smart, we can easily talk ourselves out of just about anything. Arguments that keep us within our comfort zone (at the expense of our joy) may be convincing, but rarely lead us to the sense of fulfillment we seek.

We try to right the present by overthinking our past.

Though reflection and story sorting is essential to growth and healing, many of us get so good at making sense of our past that it detracts from our present. Spending a greater percentage of our time in the present moment through mindful awareness increases the quality of everything we do.

We attempt to avoid pain.

Our culture teaches us that pain is bad and to be avoided at all cost. The truth is that pain is an inevitable part of our experience and essential for growth and healing. By facing painful situations, allowing them to teach us what we’re meant to learn and letting them pass through us, our fears of being hurt have less and less power over us.

We’re vague about what we want in life.

Our lives are so full of options that it’s easy to live in a state of constant indecision. By learning to silence the noise around us (and within our busy minds) we become more clear about what it is we really want, which is an essential step toward creating lives we love.

We apologize or make excuses for our awesomeness.

Because every version of brilliance is unique and therefor easily labeled as weird or socially unacceptable, we try to fit in by dumbing ourselves down. Being fully ourselves can even seem like a burden to others, depending on whether we were validated for who we truly are when we were young. To apologize for who we are, however, is to apologize for being a piece of the universe. No gift so invaluable as this needs justification.

We take things personally.

Nothing anyone does is really about you. People’s reactions to you are based on their limited awareness and emotions. Taking things personally is a way we distort our sense of importance. We are important, just not based on whether or not others approve of us.

We believe the myth of failure.

Failure is not a fact, failure is a judgement. When we think we might fail, we hold back our greatest gifts for fear of finding out we’re worth even less than we thought. By thinking of failures, instead, as powerful game changers or essential life lessons, we can choose to gain from them and keep going, better equipped.

No matter how confusing our culture makes it seem, your unique brilliance is exactly what the world needs. In fact, it’s the ONLY thing the world needs from you.

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Some words about generosity

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We think of love as founded on admiration for our partner. Instead, a lot of time, we should see love as an act of generosity towards our partner’s less appealing sides.

Although we may look like adults, in many ways we remain children. Like children, we are not always able to diagnose and communicate what is really bothering us. This doesn’t mean our partners should be treated like children, but that their complaints might need to be translated for their deeper meaning. When we can manage it, we should focus on soothing and reassuring rather than hitting back with equal force.

The will to be generous isn’t weakness, it’s charity towards the partner’s frailties, based on a sound recognition that we too will soon enough need them to be benevolent to us.

Anyone we get together with will, over time, require a considerable degree of generosity.

That’s why we call love, with good reason, hard work. It isn’t a sign that love has gone wrong, but that it’s grown into something mature, substantial, and worth valuing.

 

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Choose to be happy

In life, u can choose to be happy, or u can choose to be miserable.

When u decide to be happy, u look at life from a different perspective. U see situations positively instead of negatively, u make more of an effort to get things done and meet your goals, to have good times and good memories instead of sitting around in misery feeling sorry for yourself. If u are feeling dejected and remorseful, now is the time to choose to have a happy life. U don’t have to be miserable, u don’t  have to cause problems for yourself or do things that will make u unhappy. Instead, decide that your life will be fun, entertaining and fulfilled. Choose to leave negativity and misery behind u. Being miserable isn’t benefiting u and it’s probably making those around u miserable too. Choose to step above despair into joy. The choice is yours.

What do u choose? Will u be happy or sad? Choose to be happy and u’ll find that the world opens up to u in ways u couldn’t have even imagined. xx

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